By Isle of Wight Observer
Imagine a giant meteorite is heading our way and can’t be stopped. Would you honestly trust this calamitous government to tell you about it? Dr Brian May is a rock star, astronomer and (almost) family friend. I follow him on Instagram, and urge you to do the same.
Obviously, if you have full confidence in Starmer & Co, or believe ignorance is preferable to advance notice, you needn’t bother.
Personally, before it all goes dark, I’d like to get my affairs in order and say my goodbyes. Space conspiracies usually bore me. I have little patience for those who believe the moon landings were faked, and don’t get me started on flat earthers.
I interviewed David Icke once – he made far more sense than I’d expected. I’m not sure that I ever believed in money – and ‘quantitative easing’ is good evidence that they can manufacture it easily whenever it suits. However, Mr Icke hardly paused long enough to answer any of my questions and frankly lost me completely with his shape-shifting lizards theory. He couldn’t have known that I had a relative working for the royal family – the boss never transformed in her presence.
Over many decades, governments have convinced me to take whatever they tell us with a pinch of salt. Take last week’s mini-budget: even Rachel’s own side knew the chancellor’s predictions were preposterous.
There’s no likelihood whatsoever of any of her financial targets being met, and her new homes prediction is nothing more than a wild guess. A lapsed regular, at Gamblers Anonymous meetings, wouldn’t risk 50p on Rachel’s dodgy numbers coming in.
No-one in the government has a shred of business experience, so it’s little wonder they’re blind to the impact their tax and cost of living rises will have. If you really wanted to get people off welfare and back to work, you wouldn’t make employing them more expensive – nor give them improved employment rights from day one.
Employees are like life partners; it’s best to try before you buy!
Keir and Co love talking about “planned growth” while halving the actual figure and delivering austerity. As those cynical Americans say, “Please don’t pee on my leg and tell me it’s raining.”
The latest stamp duty changes will all but kill the fragile housing market for anything other than the tiniest homes. Britain’s housing market already resembles Monty Python’s Norwegian blue parrot. It is deceased and pushing up daisies. Next year, when the UK economy is in recession and Rachel’s long gone, the new chancellor’s first move will be to reduce stamp duty “to stimulate the housing market”.
My car dealer mate tells me “Business is terrible”; my pub and restaurant pals say they’re “clinging on by the fingertips”.
That’s before the latest rises in National Insurance, wages, heat, council tax, insurance, phone and every other bill. Companies are laying people off; very few are hiring.
This week’s immigration summit was another ridiculous stunt. The number of Dover arrivals has risen by a third since last July’s election. They reacted by “doubling down” on “smashing the gangs” rhetoric, while blaming employers and the Tories. You see now why I wouldn’t trust them to tell me about asteroids and meteorites?
Lovely Brian May moved from central London to enjoy darker skies in Surrey. He has an impressively large observatory and a giant telescope trained on the known universe. He’s trustworthy and a good egg who regularly posts astonishing space pics on Instagram. I’m fairly sure that if he saw disaster hurtling towards our pretty blue planet, he’d let us know in good time, but only on Instagram. That’s why you should sign up now!